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Showing posts from September, 2009

wolverine

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My last day in FMM and feeling really good. Pretty productive morning so I treated myself to a ripper. about 300 tunes going in the phone now, legs great, shoulders great. Wanting to explore the old FMM single track. Up Thickwood past Ross Henenger Park, up the chip trail hammering hard. See the entrance to wolverine so I dive in and remeber how cool this trail is. Again, a short track but so fun. Ride front to back, dialing almost all of it, pushing hard gears today. I seem to be getting stronger, feel it anyway, so I end up cooking around Wolveline front to back, then back to front. Shoot out on the chip trail and hook up with more single track revealing some great views of the river valley and some dead burnt out trees. Blast back out to the path and still feeling great an hour in, so I decide to hit up Lil Fisheries and tell myself to go as hard as I can the whole loop. A quick shot from the bottle and a few slices of fruit and I am off, floored from stroke 1!! aggressive tunes hel

Rest Day

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I wasn't going to ride at all today, give the knee and shoulder and day off. Decided I would be Lil Suzy Homemaker and take care of a bunch of stuff for the family. Well.....that only took like 3 hrs. And there is so much more time in the day. A lil chilly today so I geared up around 3 and headed out for just a slow and light spin. I don't know why I keep telling myself I can do slow and light, but I will keep trying!! Head down to waterways and cut off up the path as this is only going to be an hour spin...right? Chugging up the hill, knocking the crust off of my sleepy knees. Cresting the hill I decide to go the back way through some quad trails, cross the "bridge" and through rotary and back down to waterways...sounds easy right? Riiiiiiight!! These trails are so fun because they are sooo muddy. Slipping and drifting around like a 10 yr old who's mom said " Now have fun but stay outta the puddles!!" The mud is also what makes these trails difficult.

Just Pedal

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Through all that is happening right now with my family, with my life on hold in Vic, and with me, the one thing that remains is my love for riding my bike. I was super bummed this morning, didn't wanna get out of bed at all to face the day ahead. Thoughts of someone made me smile and i decided that I wouldn't be a slave to my emotions! Not today! Not ever again!! pulled my ass outta bed and went upstairs to make some koffi and breaky. A very nice stove top espresso pot was left in my lucky lil hands as well as a grinder that may or may not kill me...but thats another tale!! Had a few cups and some porridge and fruit and sat down to review some photos and write as it always clears my melon a lil bit. I am cheering up as I look past rolls of photos and put words to "paper". The whole house is quiet as mom and dad rest.....still. Cant remember them ever sleeping this much. Well maybe mom but never dad. I guess cancer kinda tuckers you out! I am feeling a lil better abou

The Pain Tells Me I'm Still Alive.

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2 weeks in FMM and not much has changed. Bill is still quite sick and tired. They have at least released him for good now as they have his pain management under control. This is good for dad so he can smoke in comfort instead of having to go downstairs to do so.......and dont get me started on the smoking!! He is getting lots of visitors which is nice, but you can see that it really tuckers him out, and he is too kind to ask people to leave, so he tuffs it out!! Aaron on the other hand is in long term care now...for longterm of course. Still depressed and not liking it but its the best for him and my family. Been up there as much as i can, when the family isnt up there. He has a nice room, almost everything he had at home so i think he will adjust in time. Dad's sisters have been here fro the first week and they are great. Cleaning up and organising and doing everything that needs to be done so mom can focuus on her two boys. They are a lil much to take, kinda like a tornadoe roll

Bills Garage

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I have been going through the garage and other spots in the house rooting though things that need to go, things that need to stay. This is a somber and sobering task! Who thought that it would be soooo tiring dealing with memories and issues buried! It was really nice to get over to The Rentons last night for Jode's Bday! Enjoyed a great dinner and a few drinks. Ive known these people since i was 4 so they are truly an extension of my family! ended up j ust being me and Lloyd at the end of the night, fire pit a blazing, cold bevvies in hand, solving the worlds problems at 2 in the am! Just reaffirmed, as another person in my life has showed me, that there is love out there and i am deserving of it! nothing can change the course of events leading me here, they are done and that's that! i am choosing happiness and learning to leave the past the past. " There Is No Hope In The Past." You are goddamn right!! looking forward for me i see so many things on the upside othe r

tyring to deal...

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First full day in The Fort started ok. Spud ( Chad Houston ) is in town for work so thank god i Brought Mary with me. We went up, grabbed Kate and Ken and all the dogs and headed out for some old school hometown trails. We rode upper fisheries loop as the bottom is a mud hole! was a nice loop as good a loop as i remember it. was a lot better after i remembered how to ride that many roots!! dropped off the pooches and kept on going for some uber fast gravel path spin, was nice to burn up the legs and all i could think was this would be awesome on a cross bike!! Up through Birchwood and over to grab some coffee! Was a nice to spend time with people that i used to spend a lot of time with in my past, to turn off the brain and just enjoy the spin. a quick beer and chat and time to head back to the family. Dad is in pretty good spirits today but you can tell its almost "time". Very fidgety an anxious and trying to get everything settled and ready so mom doesn't have to much t

Sept. 6/09

Sept 6/09 As I sit in the Calgary t int. airport I am troubled with thoughts of my upcoming few weeks. Going to see my father and brother in the H ha same time, filled with fear and anxiety. I have been in such great spirits lately, life moving forward in mostly a positive form, someone that I care for deeply, and whom I hope feels similar, riding tones and surrounding myself with people that are of the same attitude. Even work is good right now. So why……. With this latest development that brings me home it’s very hard to not start to take these things personally. I know that is a dumb statement and fairly immature, but just as things start to look up and start to become happy some unknown force just tries to thumb me down! Yes I am too sensitive and yes I am pretty hard on myself but yrs and yrs of it is starting to make me wonder. Even going as far to think I’m cursed because of an incident that happened Friday that actually I was not involved with or had any hand in